Thank you for this! I have friends who absolutely love thrifting and I have enjoyed going with them a few times, but I do find it a bit overwhelming. However, we have a thrift store here in Minnesota (Arc's Value Village) that has a FREE personal stylist who will have you fill out a form with your sizes and preferences and then pull clothes from you from their three locations. She does not work on commission and you do not have to buy anything. However, my boyfriend and I just did this with friends and both of us walked out with several items including a summer suit for him, shoes for us both, and a winter jacket for me! And no item was more than $15. It was AMAZING. It definitely sparked the desire to thrift more in me. https://arcsvaluevillage.org/shop/personal-shopping-service/
She was also very honest with me about whether something worked for me and gave me styling tips. If you live in Minnesota or have something similar in your area, DO IT!
Thanks for acknowledging that people with sensory issues might have problems with thrifting. I have issues with the smells and while I’ve tried to get over them, I get very overwhelmed. I have bought a fair amount of thrift from ThredUP but they are a lot more expensive and whether something fits is a whole other thing. I have kept things I don’t really think I should have just because they’ve arrived at my house.
yes, you have to adapt to a way of shopping that works for you. I'd only just encourage you to let go of the stuff that doesn't work, it's just causing more clutter and confusion.
I have gotten some favorite garments from thrift stores over the years.
When I was in grade school one of my friends' moms would arrange a van carpool to Goodwill in a large city. Six kids in the van, drive an hour to a vast Goodwill where all the clothes were sorted by color. She would push a cart down the aisles, grabbing off anything that she thought would fit a kid in a color they might wear. By the time we got to the dressing rooms each kid had a grocery cart full of clothes. Then an hour in the dressing rooms, trying each one on and taking it off again. Often someone would come home set up for the whole school year, but sometimes you'd only find two or three things.
For me now, thrifting works best if I'm not looking for anything and just let myself be inspired. Searching for anything particular is an exercise in frustration when I'm looking at newish collections with a full size range available--likely to end in rage or tears if I'm trying to find something specific while thrifting. I'll admit that after decades of wearing secondhand by necessity it's not my first choice for clothing myself. I am immensely grateful for the ability to purchase some new things that fit my needs (and sometimes even fit my body, ha). For me thrifting has a morass of negative connotations and I am grateful that I can choose when and how much I want to shop that way. Sometimes now instead of thrifting and getting several cheap things none of which are right for me I don't even look, and I allow myself to purchase something I need before it goes on sale in the color I really want, instead of waiting for the post-season sales and being content with the colors that haven't sold out.
I am not saying that there is anything wrong with thrifting, at all. But I think it is also ok to be grateful and appreciative if you are in circumstances where you can choose not to thrift if you don't want to.
That's incredible about the mom taking all the kids! What was the motivation?
I fully endorse buying things you like new before they go on sale and not making yourself settle for something that you don't really like as much.
It's interesting to me that I don't have more negatives connotations with thrifting since I only wore hand me downs out of necessity as a kid. Maybe because the clothes weren't specifically from the thrift store at that time.
I think the motivation was a combination of being from a small town (no local thrift store), wanting to save money, and a passion for organization and efficiency. Far easier to take everyone at once, spend one day, get it all done instead of shopping in bits and pieces every other weekend (which would have involved a significant amount of driving). She would have done it with just her own two kids, might as well bring all the friends along. There must have been at least one other adult; hard to remember now.
Maybe the best way to express it is that I have a full range of feelings about thrifting... from exuberance at finding something perfect for me, to resignation at making do with the not-quite-right, to despair at being the wrong size for everything. Very much like other shopping, really!
I was never a huge thrift store shopper when I was younger (tho I did have a collection of vintage tees back in high school!), but I am now quite committed to buying used clothes, mainly online. eBay especially has such a glut of clothing, is pretty easy to search and I've been buying from sellers who offer returns, something that Poshmark doesn't have. It is pricier, but not having to physically go through a million things when I am short on time makes it worth it for me. I also really like having to name exactly *what* I am looking for, which is somewhat helping me curb my love of buying clothes!
When I was at my smallest but still fat, I was finally able to find a couple things at a thrift store. I got a couple men’s coats for around $10. One I wore for several winters and the other one was only right for a few days a year either too warm/cold or not the right length etc. I got a skirt I could never figure out how to style and maybe something else? I definitely see the allure and benefits but I’ve never been another time when anything fit. And most of them are extremely inaccessible to disabled people. I have had to tell other disabled people and/or fat e that it’s not shameful that we can’t thrift shop because these spaces are not designed for us. It’s not our shame to bear.
I didn’t realize until I was in the sixth grade and really wanted Jordache jeans, that most people didn’t get their clothes at yard sales. 😂 Where I grew up, we seemed to have more yard sales than thrift stores. I like thrifting now when the mood strikes. I also like offer up and Poshmark when I’m looking for something specific. I really like your tip on keeping your standards high because that can be a trap for me. I always have to ask myself if I LOVE it and if I NEED it. The second one is slipperier than the first. 👀 My kids love vintage clothes so thrifting is a great way to get them unique pieces at a better price. I send pics to get a yay or nay before I buy because my mom radar isn’t always great.
That's so cool that your kids love vintage! I also do the sending pics even tho mine are still little. That's a good point about yard sales, I have often wondered why my parents didn't shop at thrift stores because everything we had was used, but I think you're right about this.
We actually called them rummage sales but I try to make it more sophisticated with “yard sales”. So as a weekend sport, we would go rummaging. 😂 I think it’s great your littles like thrifts. It helps them develop a more unique style (and saves a of money).
Nov 15, 2023·edited Nov 15, 2023Liked by Dacy Gillespie
I loved thrifting as a teen and young woman & have amazing memories of some of the pieces I found at that time… Not for me anymore as I reckoned with the fact that I need things to be fully refundable / returnable (never an option in thrift stores online or brick and mortar where I live). Also as others have mentioned, sensory issues in terms of smells, etc. It’s okay, like many things fashion related these days I’m happy to cheer for those who like it from the sidelines and stick to the formulas that work for me! Edited to add: actually I did thrift something recently, a sample of my fave ever and sadly discontinued (discontinued items are a such a topic…) perfume, Eau d’Eden by Cacharel (if you were alive in the 90s that may ring a bell) and that offered me the joy of smelling that scent again. Brought back so many memories…
I LOVE thrifting and have done so for almost thirty years, since high school. It was introduced to me as an alternative choice to like, American Eagle, perfect for my little queerling, artist self at the time . I have remained beholden to thrifting and vintage shops, for the same identity reasons, for my entire adult life. I have built up amazing collections of 80s blouses that usually feel just right for me and my style with the exception of RIGHT NOW in my life. 😩 Lately, thrifting isn’t doing it for me and I feel like a lost soul! I am six months post-partum, and admittedly uncomfortable AGAIN in this new body new self, so that might have something to do with it. I recently found a 1930s over coat at a vintage boutique at the Lake of Ozarks ( and yes. The story is as good for me sometimes as the actual item of clothing), and had a snap put on so it’s actually functional. It’s mostly lovely. But besides that, I’m struggling lately. I feel so drawn to more architectural pieces, the colors black and taupe and just less in general, that I can’t quite find my way thrifting right now. Or at least not in my usual capacity which typically includes pattern, saturated colors, polyester or silk and and a bit of a whackadoodle vibe. It’s timely for me that this is your topic today bc it’s been on my mind for a few months now. Idk where to go when my go-to isn’t working.
It's fine and normal to have phases when things works and when they don't. That certain style you thrifted in the past isn't what you want right now, listen to that! You can still thrift for blacks and neutrals, or buy new if that's what you need right now.
At your suggestion I tried thrifting, though not a brick and mortar. Thrifting is not something I'd ever considered, not something familiar. I was lucky to find a $16 wool jacket at ThredUp and this morning learned that my $15 bid on a COS wool dress was accepted (Poshmark). While I took a chance on the jacket size (it is tightly tailored and fit perfectly), I am confident the dress will fit as COS sizes are consistent and I shop there routinely. (I also placed a $15 bid on an emerald green taffeta dress for a celebratory high tea in December - which may be a bit of overkill but it's my party so I can wear what I want.) Great experiences. While there is a lot of wading through items not to my taste, home shopping is more comfortable for me than in-person so easy to get lost down the online rabbit hole for hours and call it fun. And oh my how the dopamine level rises when I cop a sale! One of the things you mention that I must be mindful of however, I shopped without a plan. I was curious about what might be available and happened upon these three items that soothed my tastebuds. They weren't items that I needed. Nor were they items that I would have placed on a list intentionally. I would have thought them cute but skipped had they been new and offered at full price. I recognize that for me thrifting can be dangerous - the thrill of a bargain.
WhooHoo. My $15 bid for the dress was rejected, so I upped to $20 and it was snapped up immediately. The emerald green, plunging neckline, A-line taffeta dress with big bow sash will arrive soon. A thrift win!
Thank you for this! I have friends who absolutely love thrifting and I have enjoyed going with them a few times, but I do find it a bit overwhelming. However, we have a thrift store here in Minnesota (Arc's Value Village) that has a FREE personal stylist who will have you fill out a form with your sizes and preferences and then pull clothes from you from their three locations. She does not work on commission and you do not have to buy anything. However, my boyfriend and I just did this with friends and both of us walked out with several items including a summer suit for him, shoes for us both, and a winter jacket for me! And no item was more than $15. It was AMAZING. It definitely sparked the desire to thrift more in me. https://arcsvaluevillage.org/shop/personal-shopping-service/
She was also very honest with me about whether something worked for me and gave me styling tips. If you live in Minnesota or have something similar in your area, DO IT!
that sounds amazing!
This sounds dreamy
Woah! That’s incredible!
Thanks for acknowledging that people with sensory issues might have problems with thrifting. I have issues with the smells and while I’ve tried to get over them, I get very overwhelmed. I have bought a fair amount of thrift from ThredUP but they are a lot more expensive and whether something fits is a whole other thing. I have kept things I don’t really think I should have just because they’ve arrived at my house.
yes, you have to adapt to a way of shopping that works for you. I'd only just encourage you to let go of the stuff that doesn't work, it's just causing more clutter and confusion.
I have gotten some favorite garments from thrift stores over the years.
When I was in grade school one of my friends' moms would arrange a van carpool to Goodwill in a large city. Six kids in the van, drive an hour to a vast Goodwill where all the clothes were sorted by color. She would push a cart down the aisles, grabbing off anything that she thought would fit a kid in a color they might wear. By the time we got to the dressing rooms each kid had a grocery cart full of clothes. Then an hour in the dressing rooms, trying each one on and taking it off again. Often someone would come home set up for the whole school year, but sometimes you'd only find two or three things.
For me now, thrifting works best if I'm not looking for anything and just let myself be inspired. Searching for anything particular is an exercise in frustration when I'm looking at newish collections with a full size range available--likely to end in rage or tears if I'm trying to find something specific while thrifting. I'll admit that after decades of wearing secondhand by necessity it's not my first choice for clothing myself. I am immensely grateful for the ability to purchase some new things that fit my needs (and sometimes even fit my body, ha). For me thrifting has a morass of negative connotations and I am grateful that I can choose when and how much I want to shop that way. Sometimes now instead of thrifting and getting several cheap things none of which are right for me I don't even look, and I allow myself to purchase something I need before it goes on sale in the color I really want, instead of waiting for the post-season sales and being content with the colors that haven't sold out.
I am not saying that there is anything wrong with thrifting, at all. But I think it is also ok to be grateful and appreciative if you are in circumstances where you can choose not to thrift if you don't want to.
That's incredible about the mom taking all the kids! What was the motivation?
I fully endorse buying things you like new before they go on sale and not making yourself settle for something that you don't really like as much.
It's interesting to me that I don't have more negatives connotations with thrifting since I only wore hand me downs out of necessity as a kid. Maybe because the clothes weren't specifically from the thrift store at that time.
I think the motivation was a combination of being from a small town (no local thrift store), wanting to save money, and a passion for organization and efficiency. Far easier to take everyone at once, spend one day, get it all done instead of shopping in bits and pieces every other weekend (which would have involved a significant amount of driving). She would have done it with just her own two kids, might as well bring all the friends along. There must have been at least one other adult; hard to remember now.
Maybe the best way to express it is that I have a full range of feelings about thrifting... from exuberance at finding something perfect for me, to resignation at making do with the not-quite-right, to despair at being the wrong size for everything. Very much like other shopping, really!
I was never a huge thrift store shopper when I was younger (tho I did have a collection of vintage tees back in high school!), but I am now quite committed to buying used clothes, mainly online. eBay especially has such a glut of clothing, is pretty easy to search and I've been buying from sellers who offer returns, something that Poshmark doesn't have. It is pricier, but not having to physically go through a million things when I am short on time makes it worth it for me. I also really like having to name exactly *what* I am looking for, which is somewhat helping me curb my love of buying clothes!
The "glut of clothing" is such a big reason why I like to buy secondhand, we don't need to be producing new clothing!
When I was at my smallest but still fat, I was finally able to find a couple things at a thrift store. I got a couple men’s coats for around $10. One I wore for several winters and the other one was only right for a few days a year either too warm/cold or not the right length etc. I got a skirt I could never figure out how to style and maybe something else? I definitely see the allure and benefits but I’ve never been another time when anything fit. And most of them are extremely inaccessible to disabled people. I have had to tell other disabled people and/or fat e that it’s not shameful that we can’t thrift shop because these spaces are not designed for us. It’s not our shame to bear.
Absolutely not shameful. If there are no options for you, how are you supposed to participate. Shared this on my IG today: https://www.tiktok.com/@thisisjessicatorres/video/7264984439564881195?lang=en
Thank you. That gave me a laugh
Great tip to take your measurements and bring a tape measure. Thanks for sharing that.
I didn’t realize until I was in the sixth grade and really wanted Jordache jeans, that most people didn’t get their clothes at yard sales. 😂 Where I grew up, we seemed to have more yard sales than thrift stores. I like thrifting now when the mood strikes. I also like offer up and Poshmark when I’m looking for something specific. I really like your tip on keeping your standards high because that can be a trap for me. I always have to ask myself if I LOVE it and if I NEED it. The second one is slipperier than the first. 👀 My kids love vintage clothes so thrifting is a great way to get them unique pieces at a better price. I send pics to get a yay or nay before I buy because my mom radar isn’t always great.
That's so cool that your kids love vintage! I also do the sending pics even tho mine are still little. That's a good point about yard sales, I have often wondered why my parents didn't shop at thrift stores because everything we had was used, but I think you're right about this.
We actually called them rummage sales but I try to make it more sophisticated with “yard sales”. So as a weekend sport, we would go rummaging. 😂 I think it’s great your littles like thrifts. It helps them develop a more unique style (and saves a of money).
I just think there's SO much kids clothing out there that barely gets used since they grow so fast, it seems crazy not to.
I loved thrifting as a teen and young woman & have amazing memories of some of the pieces I found at that time… Not for me anymore as I reckoned with the fact that I need things to be fully refundable / returnable (never an option in thrift stores online or brick and mortar where I live). Also as others have mentioned, sensory issues in terms of smells, etc. It’s okay, like many things fashion related these days I’m happy to cheer for those who like it from the sidelines and stick to the formulas that work for me! Edited to add: actually I did thrift something recently, a sample of my fave ever and sadly discontinued (discontinued items are a such a topic…) perfume, Eau d’Eden by Cacharel (if you were alive in the 90s that may ring a bell) and that offered me the joy of smelling that scent again. Brought back so many memories…
Love that :"like many things fashion related I'm happy to cheer for those from the sidelines and stick to what works for me"
I LOVE thrifting and have done so for almost thirty years, since high school. It was introduced to me as an alternative choice to like, American Eagle, perfect for my little queerling, artist self at the time . I have remained beholden to thrifting and vintage shops, for the same identity reasons, for my entire adult life. I have built up amazing collections of 80s blouses that usually feel just right for me and my style with the exception of RIGHT NOW in my life. 😩 Lately, thrifting isn’t doing it for me and I feel like a lost soul! I am six months post-partum, and admittedly uncomfortable AGAIN in this new body new self, so that might have something to do with it. I recently found a 1930s over coat at a vintage boutique at the Lake of Ozarks ( and yes. The story is as good for me sometimes as the actual item of clothing), and had a snap put on so it’s actually functional. It’s mostly lovely. But besides that, I’m struggling lately. I feel so drawn to more architectural pieces, the colors black and taupe and just less in general, that I can’t quite find my way thrifting right now. Or at least not in my usual capacity which typically includes pattern, saturated colors, polyester or silk and and a bit of a whackadoodle vibe. It’s timely for me that this is your topic today bc it’s been on my mind for a few months now. Idk where to go when my go-to isn’t working.
It's fine and normal to have phases when things works and when they don't. That certain style you thrifted in the past isn't what you want right now, listen to that! You can still thrift for blacks and neutrals, or buy new if that's what you need right now.
At your suggestion I tried thrifting, though not a brick and mortar. Thrifting is not something I'd ever considered, not something familiar. I was lucky to find a $16 wool jacket at ThredUp and this morning learned that my $15 bid on a COS wool dress was accepted (Poshmark). While I took a chance on the jacket size (it is tightly tailored and fit perfectly), I am confident the dress will fit as COS sizes are consistent and I shop there routinely. (I also placed a $15 bid on an emerald green taffeta dress for a celebratory high tea in December - which may be a bit of overkill but it's my party so I can wear what I want.) Great experiences. While there is a lot of wading through items not to my taste, home shopping is more comfortable for me than in-person so easy to get lost down the online rabbit hole for hours and call it fun. And oh my how the dopamine level rises when I cop a sale! One of the things you mention that I must be mindful of however, I shopped without a plan. I was curious about what might be available and happened upon these three items that soothed my tastebuds. They weren't items that I needed. Nor were they items that I would have placed on a list intentionally. I would have thought them cute but skipped had they been new and offered at full price. I recognize that for me thrifting can be dangerous - the thrill of a bargain.
WhooHoo. My $15 bid for the dress was rejected, so I upped to $20 and it was snapped up immediately. The emerald green, plunging neckline, A-line taffeta dress with big bow sash will arrive soon. A thrift win!
sounds amazing!