style story: corinne fay
"I felt a lot of pressure to be 'pretty' or 'feminine' in whatever ways I could because I felt like that made my fatness more acceptable"
Welcome to style stories, an interview series where I ask guests about their relationship to clothes over the course of their life, how external influences have shaped it, and the ways they’ve been able to reject societal expectations on what they should wear.
I was first aware of as the person who ran the Instagram account @selltradeplus. There had already been an account called @selltradeslowfashion, and Corinne had started the selltradeplus account as a place where plus size slow fashion afficiandos could buy and sell without having to sift through the mostly straight sized items on selltradeslowfashion.
On selltradeplus, Corinne was more of a faceless administrator, so I first got to know her as a person, as probably many of us did, as ’s right hand woman and co-host on the Burnt Toast podcast (she was also doing a lot behind the scenes). There, we got to hear her down to earth dry wit and extensive fashion knowledge. Last year, she and Virginia and I ran the unflattering x Burnt Toast style challenge and I got to spend a lot more time hanging out with Corinne on podcast recordings and text threads. Soon after, she and Virginia started the newsletter as a place for Corinne to explore style and fashion. She and I enjoy a lot of the same topics, but Corinne has the lived experience and knowledge that comes along with being a person in a larger body that I will never pretend to have.
This post is delightfully full of images and too long for email, so click through to read it all. Please enjoy!
Q: Introduce yourself, your pronouns, your work, and how you spend your time.
A: Hi! I’m Corinne. I write the Big Undies newsletter and work on Burnt Toast with Virginia Sole Smith. I also run SellTradePlus on Instagram. I live in Albuquerque New Mexico with my dog Bunny and in my free time I am getting into quilting and I like powerlifting.
Q: What was your style like when you were a child?
A: I think it was very practical and comfortable–a lot of leggings and corduroy pants and turtlenecks and stuff like that. I do remember once I put together an outfit with a pink tie-dye t-shirt, white denim shorts, and pink tights and I was really proud of that.
Q: Growing up, what messages were you given about what you should or shouldn’t wear (and from whom or where do you think those messages came)?
A: I was fascinated by fashion as a kid but didn’t have a lot of access to it growing up in Maine. I remember occasionally seeing the NYT style magazine and being transfixed by the ads for brands like Prada that as far as I know were not available in Maine. I remember being really confused about why my mom (an OB/GYN nurse practitioner) wasn’t wearing or buying the clothes in the ads.
Both my parents were pretty no-nonsense about clothes. From my dad especially I got the message that basically any amount of money spent on clothes was too much. I remember him complaining about spending $20 for a pair of dungarees (as he called jeans.) On the other hand, I remember once taking a trip to NYC with my dad and going to H&M and him buying me a coat there which I am SURE cost more than $20 and that I wore for years. I guess we all contain multitudes!
Q: How has your style evolved since you were younger and what phases have you gone through with your style (i.e. high school grunge phase, early working days business casual phase, etc)?
Oh man, where to start… I think nothing feels like a phase while it’s happening, but there have certainly been a lot of phases–although none too extreme I would say? I was never really goth or grunge or anything like that… but I did wear low rise flare jeans in highschool and I did dye my hair pink. I also screenprinted t-shirts for my friends and sewed a couple of dresses for myself in college. I was definitely interested in wearing things that felt unique to me and that still feels true.
Phases aside, I think I’ve always cared a lot about clothes being comfortable and being able to move freely in my clothes. Even if I was wearing a dress and tights, I wanted to be able to walk comfortably and bend over, etc, and I’d say that’s true for all my various phases.
Q: How have external pressures to conform to the ideal standard of beauty and the thought of how others view you affected your style?
In my twenties I felt a lot of pressure to be “pretty” or “feminine” in whatever ways I could because I felt like that made my fatness more acceptable or made it less noticeable–at least I hoped.
As I’ve gotten older, I think a lot of that–wearing dresses, painting my nails, wearing eyeliner–has really fallen away and I’m never sure whether that’s just what aging feels like for me or if I’m actively divesting or if my style has just shifted. I will also say that my mom has also never been into makeup or fashion (I had to beg her to show me how to shave my legs in junior high) so maybe it’s genetic!
I still feel certain pressures, though, of course! I feel pressure to look “put together” and I get my haircut pretty frequently because I feel like it kind of helps with that. I’m sure that somewhere in there is still an element of trying to make myself as acceptable as possible, not wanting to look “sloppy.”
Q: How have your sense of style and shopping habits shifted along with changes in your body?
A: Well, as I’ve gotten older I have also gotten bigger and that has definitely made shopping harder. It’s VERY rare for me to find something that fits me in a thrift store, which is sad because I used to really love thrifting! I still love doing it with friends. And yeah, in person shopping options for me in general are just pretty rare, unless I am going to a mall.
Q: What barriers do you encounter in trying to express your style? Are there any situations or spaces you feel your style prohibits you from accessing or gives you better access to?
Being fat, it can be really hard to express your style and to feel like you want to be part of this community of people who are interested in clothes that actively exclude you. I wrote about this here, but it sucks to discover new brands or clothes you like and to know that you’ll never be able to wear them. It’s something I struggle with. Sometimes I feel really riled up and mad about it and other times I feel more accepting of my fate. And obviously, I am not alone–there are SO many people who have even less access than I do!
Q: Do you have any style icons? Who are they?
A: Oh my gosh, so many. You, Dacy!
I also love: Matty Matheson, Lydia Okello, Nicolette Mason, Ayo Edebiri, Courtney Williams. Many of my IRL friends, too! And so many people on Substack! I love
and and and and and . I could go on!
Q: How would you define your current relationship to clothes and style?
A: It’s so hard to feel okay about shopping when there are already so many clothes in the world. And yet, clothes wear out and we change size and shape or need different things and I certainly don’t have endless time to devote to shopping secondhand. Style is also part of how we express our identities and interact with the world. And getting dressed can bring us comfort and pleasure.
So, somehow I’m trying to figure out how to balance all that!
Q: What makes your style authentic to who you are today?
A: This is such a tough question to answer and one I ask myself whenever I am wearing something that I think “feels like me” – why does it feel like me?
I do think there is both a comfort element and an aesthetic element–I’m able to feel most authentically myself when I’m not being pinched or poked by my clothes. And then aesthetically I think it can be harder to pin down. I think I like simple things, but a little interesting, too. Nothing too frilly, but I do like sheer things and silky things and I don’t mind a little bit of ruffle. But I also love denim and workwear and canvas!
Q: Do you wear anything that’s conventionally considered unflattering?
A: Fat people are always told to wear black or dark colors because they are “slimming” and I definitely don’t always do that. (and if I do wear black or dark colors, it’s not so I look slimmer!)
But also: baggy stuff in general, sweatpants, bike shorts, longer shorts, shorter shorts, wider leg pants, sports bras, stripes.
Corinne, thank you so much for sharing yourself and your style story with us!
Go subscribe to Corinne’s wonderful newsletter here and follow her on Instagram here. If you enjoyed this, here are style stories from Virginia Sole-Smith, Virgie Tovar, Jessica Defino, Frankie de la Cretaz, Ajiri Aki, Erika Veurink, Amanda Richards, Shana Minei Spence, Jess Kirby, Bri Campos, Shira Gill, Sushmita Šipraga, and Emma Eisenberg.
Paid subscribers, read on for 3 of Corinne’s favorite wardrobe items.
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